I dreamt twice that I was running backwards. I hit the search engine about dream analysis only to find out that it means, reversal of decisions. How I struggle right now and I am in denial. Turning into life that involves risks. I’d rather take it than follow what others would do.
All I can say is, I am going to do what I want and what truly makes me happy because I matter. Everything about me matters. It’s time to continue who I really want to be. I am sorry for hurting you if it involves disappointing you people but I won’t say sorry for who I am. It’s time to take my stand, to prioritize what makes me “me”, give myself a shot for I deserve a pat on my back, I deserve to be alive and my existence to be recognized.
I matter and I choose me.
We never address ourselves us “jen" and "bryan”.
We’re always “marriz" and "adel" but if something came up, the mood’s down. First names first.
This hallmark card is already 26 years old.
So sweet and sentimental of you to give me this. This card has been kept by your mom for so long and I am honored to have this. Thank you my dear.
The very first card that I received from a lover :)
Right now, I want to:
“I’m here not because I am supposed to be here, or because I’m trapped here, but because I’d rather be with you than anywhere else in the world.”
— Richard Bach, The Bridge Across Forever: A True Love Story
Why settle on just being happy when you can be happier.
This is the start of our countless days of love, fun and adventure. I wanna thank the heavens for sending us together. The earth may beset us unfairness, cruelty and judgment yet no inch of sorrow and trial may keep me from you. Today marks that “I am yours and you are mine.” I love you.
Him: Naniniwala kaba sa true love?
Me: I wish :)
Him: Tinatanong kasi sa tv eh. It’s not like destiny type daw. May nagsabi naman kapag may hindrance hindi daw true love. Sabi naman ni counselor, kahit daw may hindrance basta daw magawang magtagumpay, yun ang true love.
Me: Talaga. So naniniwala ka?
Him: Naman. Naniniwala ako. Naniniwala ako sa’yo eh.
Like I am stuck and I cannot get out of this mesh of insanity.
Like I am on the verge of jumping because I cannot do anything about this shit life I am into.
Like I am numb of the things around me. I am hurt but I can’t complain.
Like I am buried and eaten alive by pain, indescribable pain.
Like I want to scream, my head is burning with thoughts that no one else would understand.
Like I want to drift away, if I’m gone, no one will find me. I’d like no one to find me at all.
Like I want to act like no one else’s opinion matters.
Like I want to be unafraid, take risk and kiss goodbye to my comfort zone.
Like I want to be happy and never want to hurt anybody at the same time.